Bringing Out Treasures Both Old and New

After four years of hardly ever darkening the door of a church, I knew that I had to attend the Midnight Mass on Christmas Eve 2010.

 I found a church close to where I live, made a telephone call to find out what time the night’s proceedings began, and went to Mass.

The night was wonderful, despite being caught in a storm on my way home.  The carol service before Mass delighted me.  I think there is something very special about those songs.  Those old words and melodies have the power to transport me back to my childhood and, more than that, they carry in them a Presence that is peace and joy.

The Mass itself was beautiful.  A well-trained choir meant that there was the inclusion of some Latin chant, including the Missa de Angelis Gloria.  Complimenting the choir was a band of guitars and keyboards.  The liturgy was celebrated with dignity and solemnity and a very human touch. 

Beyond the pomp and ceremony of the Roman rite, however, was that familiar Presence at once both so simple and containing the very depths of God in all mystery. 

 

On walking into the church and seeing the tabernacle with its red lamp burning, I felt as though I had walked into the presence of a very dear friend who had been waiting patiently for my arrival.

I was touched, to the very core of my being.  I knew that my journey had once again taken an unexpected turn.  A light had dawned within, and I heard a voice say, “This is the way, walk ye in it.”

Christmas Eve 2010 effectively saw my “return” to a church that I had all but given up on. 

My “return” to the Catholic church has puzzled and confounded a number of my Pagan friends.  I’ve been accused of being a “christo-fascist” and a traitor to the Old Gods.  I’ve not been very good at explaining myself to these people, because it’s not very easy to put the continuing spiritual argosy of a lifetime into a brief conversation.  Attempts to provide items for reflection have usually fallen on deaf ears – either because people are unwilling to seek understanding and wisdom because of their own personal demons or their own pride. 

As my Traditional Crafting deepens, it illuminates so much of my “Catholicism”.  So much of the past has taken on new meaning, new life, and is relevant to my journey today.  Also, my Catholic background has given me a foundation that has possibly made it easier for me to relate to various aspects of Trad Craft that some might have difficulty with.  A case of “bringing out of my treasure what is new and what is old” (Matthew 13:52)?

The Good Shepherd

Of course, in the eyes of the church, I would be deemed a heretic.  Right-thinking Catholics, if they knew of my dual-faith, would probably have very little to do with me.  This doesn’t bother me in the least.  I’m not here to please people.  I’m here to seek the Grail.

I see it as no accident that I chose Mary Magdalen as my patron saint when I was confirmed during my reception into the church just over a decade ago.  At the time, I had various reasons for choosing her.  Some of those were based upon her popular myth, others were based on the Gospel accounts.  Another reason was the link of her name to that of a beloved relative of mine who had died several years before my reception into the church.  This person taught me the ‘Hail Mary’ and the Apostle’s Creed.

A few people giggled when our parish priest anointed me with the sacred chrism saying, “Mary Magdalen, be sealed with the gift of the Holy Spirit.”  Knowing what I know now, I can’t but help giggle myself, but for different reasons. 

For some Gnostic Christians, the Magdalen is the Bride of Christ – and she is also the Holy Spirit/Sophia, from whom Christ received His anointing!

There came a point in my life as a Catholic where the Virgin Mary became a central figure, and I was clothed in the brown scapular.  A few years later, I had effectively “left the church”. 

Hail, Queen! Mother of Mercy

 

It was last year, when going through a dark night of the soul, that a friend of mine passed on words she had received for me through divination.  Those words led me to reflection and prayer, and it was quite unexpectedly that I had a flash of Vision and the Morning Star finally appeared.  I was granted the knowledge that my entire journey is in Her hands – She who is Mother and Bride of the Shining One who brings the light of the dawn, who is the light of the dawn.

I have recognized the Goddess and the Old Gods hidden within the church, and have come to an ever-deepening dual-faith.  I’d like to think that I’m experiencing the truth of that Unity from which all mystical paths spring.

Spiritual reasons aside, I’m also happy to be a part of the church for cultural reasons.  Living in South Africa has meant a certain distance from my cultural and ethnic roots.  Here, the native people still uphold and appreciate much of their traditional culture.  I’ve always been conscious of my ancestry, but in terms of knowledge, not practice.  I realised that so much of European culture became entwined with that of the Catholic church, and rediscovering elements of “Catholic culture” is enabling me to rediscover and practice the culture of my bloodlines.  I’ve found that my own sense of identity has been strengthened, and I’m able to celebrate my own culture in a land where cultural identity means so much to so many people.

"Therefore every scribe who has been trained for the kingdom of heaven is like the master of a household who brings out of his treasure what is new and what is old." - Matthew 13:52